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So... I love chicken parmigiana. Like, a lot. And I'm a really picky eater to begin with, so it's awesome that I like chicken parm so much, because a lot of other people like it, right?!

Well, the last time my boyfriend's mom made it, she got differently sized chicken breasts somehow—there were both large and small ones. No big, though, right?

Except, I got one of the larger chicken breasts, and as I'm nomming happily along, I notice that something is a little off, so I looked at the chicken. Usually I'll cut things like chicken and steak to make sure they're done to my liking, but this time I did not, sadly. D:

It was still translucent-pink raw. .____. I was only two or three bites in around the edge, but still... like, the entire chicken breast was like that. Only the outermost edges were cooked. And, to my knowledge, none of the other ones came out undercooked like that, so I got the shit end of the deal on that, I guess.

I didn't get sick or anything, thankfully, but I really have not wanted chicken parm ever since, and this is especially sad because my mom made her absolutely awesome chicken parm with noodles for my sister's birthday on the 9th, and I didn't want any. D: Sigh.

Underwood Deviled Ham: Now With Maggots!

To Whom It May Concern,
Yesterday I made a sandwich of your deviled ham spread, which I ate then gave the remainder of the can to my dog. As I was forking out the product, there was one complete maggot...if it was a maggot! the size of a slug, two or three half bits, and a lot of liquefied yellow-white goo mixed in with the bottom of the can and around the edges. Be assured that I have contacted the Poison Control, who are in turn contacting MN Dept. of Agriculture and the Food and Drug Administration. I also contacted the store in which I purchased this horrifying product for them to remove it from their shelves. As I am an active member of the internet communities, you will also find this broadcasted on multiple networking sites. This was morally reprehensible and downright disgusting. I have now come to question prepackaged foods and have lost my faith in the food industry because of this "blunder."
I am interested in a reply to this matter.


Product ID:
Underwood Deviled Ham
BBMAR062013 11:37
1DH EST 34146
Purchased 2/23/10


Back when I used to live with my parents, we had a problem with moths. My mom had brought this bag of birdseed apparently infested with moth larvae, because we had moths EVERYWHERE! Even after she put the bag outside. After a while we got used to the constant moths, if we saw one we'd smack it and throw it into the fishtank (the fish are really really obese now, teehee).

My dad has this lovely habit where he never cleans up after himself and likes to put open cracker/cereal/whatever boxes back in the cupboard without even bothering to roll up or clip the plastic bag closed. My mom also used to leave really old baking supplies eg. flour, baking soda, and SUGAR, open in the cupboards. Can you see where this is going?

Anywho, I was moved out by this time, but my mom told me about how she decided to make chicken pot pie with bisquick, and when she looks in the bag it was ALIIVE with moths and larvae and disgusting things. They had to throw away practically everything in the cupboards and clean them crazily. Nasty shit.


non-epic first post is non-epic

So, recently I cleaned out the kitchen of the house where I'm living! Here are the fun things I found in vague detail because I needed to prod the styling of the community and also I disliked that it looked so lonely. Also, this is the crap I posted to my personal journal that inspired this fit of community-making, so perhaps this tale will serve to regale others for its lengthy existence on the web or something grandiose like that. :p

1. Exploded can of some kind of diced fruit. Whenever it had exploded, it had coated everything around in the juices or syrup. Of course, by the time I got to this can, this syrupy shit had turned completely black and viscous. The can itself seemed hollow—I don't think there was anything left in it. o_o I wasn't going to prod at it to find out.

2. No joke, an entire "forgotten" pantry. Seriously, I opened it up, and everything in it was absolutely covered with cobwebs and dust. It was mostly cereal, crackers, maybe even cookies—but yeah, it was decidedly not good. I checked some of the expiration dates, and most of them were dated approximately 2007. I asked the man about it, since obviously he's been living here way longer than me, and his only response was that it had simply been abandoned and gotten so gross over time no one wanted to touch it. Wat? Okay, things get abandoned, but an entire cabinet in your house?! XD It's not even in an out-of-the-way place, it's right above the freaking oven in the kitchen!

3. Numerous bags of bread with the last 2-3 slices of bread so old they had turned totally black and completely hard. There were at least three of these, possibly more. D:D:D:

4. I'm pretty sure I found one thing with an expiration date of 2003. :| This was only a month or two ago, too. Aaaah. I don't clearly recall what it was (or even if I really did find it) and it wasn't terribly gross, but something that old is just... whoa. XD

Even just now when I cleaned the kitchen out, I had to throw out some chicken that was turning. It had begun to stink through the packaging and the chicken juice had leaked out a bit all over the shelf (which, of course, is the uppermost shelf! rawrawrawarar, keep that shit on the lowest shelf plzkthx) and just rawr. :[



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